Monday Morning

4 day work weeks are always nice. Spending some quality time in the woods with a good friend makes it even nicer.

What? oh yes, I'm going to ride in the dirt with Taryn tonight. Test riding a new beast that is up for review. 5" of suspension love and gears. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to handle it but I am up for the learning curve. The El Bastardo is the bike up for review. Going to the hills later in July to really push its limits. Larger brakes are needed but not a requirement yet. My skill set isn't ready to be pushed that far.




Oh, I'm rambling.

My weekend went well, not that you asked. Rode a bit, talked a bit and hopefully caught up on some sleep. Wait, that last bit was a lie. I didn't catch up on any sleep.

The plan for the week - is ride, wrench, sleep, work, ride, clean, work, fiona shaved, clean and then a friend is coming to visit.

Poop

may refer to:

• Stern, the rear or aft part of a ship or boat
  • Poop deck, a deck that constitutes the roof of a cabin built in the aft
  • To be pooped, in nautical parlance, means to have a wave come over the stern from abaft.
• Feces, waste product from an animal's digestive tract expelled through the anus
  • Defecation, the act or process by which organisms eliminate feces
  • Pooper-scooper, used by dog owners to pick up their pet's fecal matter

I was crapped, shatted, dumped on by a bird this morning while Fiona and I were walking. Right on my bicep so it trickled down to my wrist and hand before I could stop it. "Shit" I shouted and then laughed at myself. Being a stone's throw from my building I tried to hurry Fiona along so we could find soup and some water to remove the feces from my arm. Funny how I was out trying to get Fiona to take a crap so I could pick it up in a baggy and place it in the trash can.. just to have a bird crap on me. In the hand that normally holds the baggy for the poop (the baggy had already been tossed with Fiona's goodness.)

What a way to start my early Saturday morning. After a shower I made some hot chocolate and have been blog hopping for the past 5 minutes. Gathering my thoughts and trying to propel myself to get dressed and get going. A little bit of work to do today and then a ride in the dirt this evening.


On a side note - the commute to work is getting steamier. Not hotter but steamier. Where there is less of a breeze and more of a stale mid-summer air that I have to gulp down in attempt to swallow it. The week prior I was wearing a tshirt and a pair of dickies shorts (or something close) and this week I had to return to wicking lycra and polyester. I'm trying to avoid showering once I get to work, so staying as dry as possible is needed.

Only one word

Only One Word
Smile

Where is your cell phone?
Desk

Your significant other?
Fiona

Your hair?
Crazy

Your mother?
Loving

Your father?
Step-father

Your favorite thing?
loving

Your dream last night?
her

Your favorite drink?
water

Your dream/goal?
living

The room you're in?
office

Your ex?
sad

Your fear?
failure

Where do you want to be in 6 years?
mountains

Where were you last night?
studio

What you're not?
short

Muffins?
warm

One of your wish list items?
G5

Where you grew up?
Maryland

The last thing you did?
Typed

What are you wearing?
pants

Your TV?
nope

Your pets?
1

Your computer?
mac

Your life?
happy

Your mood?
busy

Missing someone?
yes

Your car?
Audi

Something you're not wearing?
Dress

Favorite Store?
Birkenstock

Your summer?
simple

Like someone?
always

Your favorite color?
pink

When is the last time you laughed?
today

Last time you cried?
yesterday

Good Enough

Started to run again. I would use that term loosely, instead the word I use is "ru-alking." If it is cool enough either in the morning or evening I'll take Fiona with me, but more often I'll get home from work, walk the pup and then go for a run by myself. No music, no objective, just exploring and finding my way around my new neck of the woods.

The experience is very eye opening. I haven't really run or wanted to run since high school or that year after. I had some fire burning in me then, to seek out self abuse and mental cleansing. Those two things I don't seem to do on a bike right now. Yes, biking does clear my mind but I can't simply zone out on a bike. All my senses are at attention waiting for a car, stick or person to jump out and bite me. With running I simply get in this weird somber mood of content. Walk, run, walk, walk, run. It seems to be helping. Hopefully soon it will be run, run run, walk, run run run.

If I'm not running I seem to be taking the dog for long walks, often to the local cemetery or park. Taking photos along the way and allowing her freedom to explore, chase and be a happy dog. I feel guilty some days that she doesn't have a yard or younger sister to play with daily anymore but I do believe she is just as happy with us hanging out tons again.

A few photos from our walk tonight...

"Hey your glass is empty
It’s a hell of a long way home
Why don’t you let me take you
It’s no good to go alone
I never would have opened up
But you seemed so real to me
After all the bullshit I’ve heard
It’s refreshing not to see
I don’t have to pretend
She doesn’t expect it from me

Don’t tell me I haven’t been good to you
Don’t tell me I have never been there for you
Don’t tell me why
Nothing is good enough"
-Sarah McLachlan

Critical Mass - Charlotte

I haven't been to a Critical Mass ride in Charlotte. I have been to one in Boston, DC and Columbia, SC. All of them were different, all seemed a bit chaotic but maybe a well planned/peaceful one is needed in Charlotte.




Daily I ride or drive 6 miles out of the heart of Charlotte. Down one of the largest artiries to work. Daily I am seeing more commuters, more scooters and more motorcycles. Maybe the revolution is happening and it won't be motorized.

I'll Take It

This past weekend I ended up being neutral support at the Cowbell Challenge. This was the third year in a row for me to do neutral support and I enjoy it greatly. This year was a little special as they had a "Support Award." The very cool thing is I won such award. The bad thing is I have to pass it on to a supporting member of a team. I guess I can't consider Team Dicky as my supporting team...

Thank you for coming out to be a neutral mechanic for all the racers at the Cowbell this year. It was a really good year for the Cowbell race. As you may know or have heard your were awarded the Best Support to a team.

This is were it gets a little tricky, the award is intended for a person or persons that help out their team member that is involved in the race and racing.

Cowbell Challenge 2008

Cowbell was a bit different then planned 6 months ago. Different location, lack of spandex clad arsbars and a different sponsor shop.

The event went off very well. Taylor, of cowbell, did miracles with lengthening the course. My thoughts are to keep the trail that way but it is said the pastures will grow over. Seeing friends I only see once a year at this event was rewarding. Zeke & Carey, please come back soon. Namrita & Eddie you were missed.

"Get away from me
Get away from me, this isnt gonna be easy
But I dont need you
Believe me
You got a piece of me
But its just a little piece of me" - Counting Crows

Like a Ghost

Do you notice the contrast of white on white? Do you see how simple I am trying to make my life?

Bill was trying to teach me lens play.

Arsbars.com as I once knew is gone. A fatal moment one afternoon at work, the wrong FTP login and here I am starting over. Funny how the timing works. I start over my life one week, my phone the next and my internet life the next. My life is now a counting crows song rolling over and over.


Closure was found this weekend. Comfort in routine is the next goal. Dunkin Donuts for breakfast, dog walking, work, rides and routine will be made. Need to go out, speak, drink and drive less. Read, listen, ride and paint more.

Haunt Me

The nights seem to be haunting me. Around 7pm I start dreading the next 3-5 hours of my day. Feeling helpless is not something I do well. The thought of sleeping alone or empty handed is still something new.

Hands searching in the night to touch her skin again, to feel the way her body always pressed against every inch of my front side. The smell of her hair as it tickled my nose. Breathing it in until I had to move the tickling else where.

Learning myself is something I haven't done for many summers. Waking up every morning for yourself and not another. It is energizing but very stressful. The need for list have overcome me. List for work, list for after work and in the end I just simply shut down. My mind a blank until someone moves me. A text, an email or a knock on the door.

This isn't regret I am feeling but loss of something bigger than myself. Staying strong and focusing on things I shouldn't be focusing on.

Tomorrow is a new day and maybe I will be ready to wake.

Dear Mother

We aren’t as close as some mother/daughter duo’s. I often am jealous by those that talk to their mother daily about everything that is going on in each others lives. I love what we have and would never change it. A single mother, multiple jobs and many hardships. I always went to the good school and you always found time to be my sports coach.

Unfortunately I haven’t been that picture perfect child. Dropping out of school, skipping class and deciding my path was the very unbeaten one. I have always gone forward with your support and I thank you for that. If its a phone call to talk me through a crazy move or money when I was broke. (My latest Dirt Devil Broom is amazing.) You have been there.

This is my public announcement to you, thank you and I admire everything you have done for us in your life.
Love
-Ar